See, I'm Real

Grace, Mercy, and Redeeming Love

**So…part of the original title of this post was “A Brief Reflection”….yea…I had to take that out because it quickly became a not so brief reflection**

I’ve got those end-of-the-school-reflection-feelings…that being said-the direct reason for my reflection: We have had John a whole entire school year…and all of us survived-more accurately-we ended up THRIVING.

Today was the last day of his second grade career and by the grace and love of Jesus, he is a changed child.  And by that same grace and love of Jesus, Christopher and I are changed adults.

To say that this has been difficult would be obvious.  I know that I made that painfully obvious at times with some emotional meltdowns that I am so not proud of.  I have to confess that  sometimes my focus was more on the situation than on Jesus, and those were very low times.  I have learned and I am learning, look at Jesus at all times.

And now I am about to POINT directly to heaven.  We have so many praises this school year so I want to just quickly touch on the big ones.

Praise God, the phone calls home saying that they could not ‘control’ John and we needed to come up to the school STOPPED completely the second half of the year.  I think we only got 1 or 2 calls home at all the second half of the year, and they did not require us going up to the school.

Praise God and THANK God, the rage fits are now a rare occurrence.

Praise God, the therapist attests to John’s success this year.  In fact-we have one more appointment set out 6 weeks and she has advised she does not need to meet with him if these 6 weeks go as well as they have been going.  His therapist ALSO explained that she knows this quick of an adjustment and healing is only because of Jesus.

Praise God, my prayer for a mother’s heart is being answered.  I can feel my heart changing and things I never thought I would feel are starting to be birthed in my heart.  It is so beautiful and only a change that God could have brought upon me.

Praise God, there is GRACE and MERCY and REDEEMING LOVE and now our family has a deeper understanding of how this works-and will only go deeper into a new understanding as we continue together with Jesus.

Praise God, I am married to my best friend and that he is a godly man who saw me at my absolute worst and loved me and counselled me through it.  He was my strength when I thought I had none-he loved me when I was unlovable.  He directed my eyes back to the victory of Jesus when they wanted to stay stuck on the defeat in this world.  We are learning to be the team God brought us together to be and it’s like…really cool.

Only God is this big.  Only God could work this miracle.  Only in God is there this type of healing.  Only God could have brought us all through the fire of adjustment and changed all of our hearts for the better.

God showed me a new level to an obvious thought the other day that is still overwhelming me to think about.

God SAW John.  Did you get that?  God looked down from heaven-and SAW John.  God also SAW Chris and I.  In His divine wisdom-He moved Chris…and He moved me…and He moved us together….without us even realizing it..and He moved all the others that John needed…and He RESCUED John.  All of those who have helped us in this and who took care of him before Chris and I, were moved by God to take care of John.  All of this for a little boy, and by golly that little boy LOVES Jesus and he LOVES all of his family.

My heart?  Yea…it’s pretty full.

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